Sharing my mourning journey as my family learns to live a new normal after the death of my 19 y.o. son in an auto accident on 10/12/08.

Off To Measure Trees

It is a beautiful day in my town today. For the first time in a while the sky is blue and the weather is warm. I’m off to get some sun on my face and busy myself with measuring tree circumferences to see how much ribbon the trees we’ve picked will need. I ordered bookplates to serve as information cards for each ribbon:

It’s hard not to think about what I’d be doing right now if Jordan were alive. Suitcases would be lined up and we’d be off to the airport to ready ourselves for his graduation. I vacillate between feeling like such an obsessed oddball for choosing this task as my way of honoring Jordan and then in the next instant I’m proud that I found a way to remember what would have been a magnificent day. With each passing day the obsessed feeling recedes and the anticipation of keeping Jordan’s memory alive boosts my energy and spirit.

The weather this weekend is iffy here, with chances of rain both Saturday and Sunday. A bright spot for me at least will be purple ribbons dotted throughout my village, providing a little light on what might feel like a dark day.

I would really appreciate pictures of the purple ribbons from those of you who will be tying them on your trees. Thank you


Comments on: "Off To Measure Trees" (3)

  1. my thoughts are with you.

  2. Tracy M. said:


    These information cards are a beautiful tribute to Jordan; by reading these even a stranger who comes across them will know what a unique spirit he has (that “J” you chose is beyond lovely, by the way!). I know that graduation season is heavy with memories and emotions even for families who have not suffered a loss, so I cannot imagine what you are going through. Please know that even though I do not have a tree of my own (I live in an apartment) I will be thinking of you and your family and especially your Jordan this weekend.
    Also, I hope the sun makes an appearance on your corner of the Midwest this weekend.

    Tracy M.

  3. You are an amazing mother and teacher!

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